What Your Wife Means When She Says…

By | January 27, 2012

One of the most important issues in any relationship is communication. With good, consistent communication, any potential problems between spouses are quickly mitigated because they’re not allowed to balloon or fester.

But communication is a two-way street, and if you want to be a good husband, you shouldn’t only be able to communicate from your end, but listen to your wife. And if you think that women are too tough to figure out, this is the guide for you. Let’s take a look at some potential answers to what your wife really means when she says…

“We Never Do Anything Romantic Anymore”

If it feels like the spark is lacking lately, you’re more likely to hear this one. It’s not that your wife is asking for a monthly quota of candle-lit dinner dates; there’s nothing spontaneous or exciting about something you arrange on your Google Calendar.

Instead, this is more about spontaneity. When’s the last time you made a gesture to your wife simply because you were thinking about her?

Keep in mind that you don’t have to do a “nice gesture” to be romantic again – that’s not really what your wife is asking for. Empty gestures will only exacerbate the problem. Instead, let your wife know that you do not take your relationship for granted by doing whatever you can to avoid a regular routine. Take her out on a weekend trip once in a while – without her asking you to make the gesture – and you’ll hear this less and less.

“I Want You to Be More Interested in What I’m Saying”

Again, when your wife essentially tells you what she wants, you have to remember that submitting to her will won’t improve your relationship. Instead, fix the core problem: if your wife feels like you’re not interested enough in what she’s saying, she’s not necessarily telling you to get more interested in her work situation, or her love of Food Network shows.

Instead, you have to get more interested in your wife again. Listen to her because you like her, not because you want to do anything you can to please her. Remember when your relationship was still in the honeymoon phase and you were interested in whatever she said simply because she was saying it? Try to remember what it’s like to have that spark, and work to integrate it back into your relationship.

Whenever you’re dealing with interpersonal communication – whether with colleagues or your spouse – you have to pay attention to the sub-communication as well as the direct verbal communication. When your wife has a problem, don’t assume that the solution is as simple as the logical answer. Sometimes, she’s just venting her frustrations and needs you to be more intimate. That’s all.

Of course, if you need to reintroduce a spark in your relationship, don’t be afraid to try out Kupple.com in order to mix it up and finally pay each other the attention you know you’ve both been craving.

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